tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post4764816281371270967..comments2023-06-24T07:53:47.609-07:00Comments on Hollis Polk's Change Your Life in 10 Minutes a Day: More Lessons from Wife Swap (& its aftermath)Hollis Polkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17221165807308394193noreply@blogger.comBlogger318125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-68868695561685424102009-02-03T17:04:00.000-08:002009-02-03T17:04:00.000-08:00Thanks StephenThanks StephenUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01449108524198344863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-89798310063929724102009-02-03T16:56:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:56:00.000-08:00Drew, your comment confirms Grayling's analysis.Drew, your comment confirms Grayling's analysis.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-67456004747417189332009-02-03T16:51:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:51:00.000-08:00Oh Stephen,You will never understand how much you ...Oh Stephen,<BR/><BR/>You will never understand how much you don't get it.<BR/><BR/>Kind of makes me feel good about myself.<BR/><BR/>Thanks!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01449108524198344863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-18388374208079853192009-02-03T16:50:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:50:00.000-08:00“This is especially true of hatred, which is disli...“This is especially true of hatred, which is dislike and antipathy inflamed to a high degree and inspired by beliefs which stimulate a set of other emotions in the hater, chief among them fear, ignorance, jealousy, anger and disgust. But note that all these emotions, and especially the first three, are about the hater; thus hating says more about haters than what they hate. It shows weakness for it is a crude emotion which turns fears and anxieties outward to fix them on something else. When one dislikes a person on good grounds – because he is provenly dishonest, malevolent, or treacherous, say – the appropriate reaction is disdain, and a withholding of social courtesies. Someone truly contemptible does not merit the energy that stronger emotions require. And as La Rochefoucauld observed, ‘When our hatred is too keen it puts us below those we hate,’ which is an allied point.<BR/>“Moralisers – those who seek to impose on everyone else their own timid conception of morality, usually in the form of [the] ‘family values’ ethos – are in a fair way to being haters of anyone who thinks differently from them. Certainly the ingredients are there: fear of different choices and lifestyles, ignorance about their interests and experiences, jealousy of their freedom from the disciplines that the moralists impose on themselves, disgust and anger at what others do: these are the ingredients of hate which, when wrapped in the pious rhetoric of conventional morality, breed repression, illiberality, and narrowness. A key lies in the fact that the views which moral conservatives try to impose on others are often an expression of what they most fear in themselves: ‘if you hate a person,’ Herman Hesse remarked, ‘you hate something in him which is part of yourself.’”<BR/><BR/>A.C. Grayling<BR/><BR/>“ … it is almost impossible to hate an individually known human being.”Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-87693380414383065442009-02-03T16:47:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:47:00.000-08:00This comment has been removed by the author.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-54633936648554268392009-02-03T16:12:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:12:00.000-08:00damo you said:Freedom to express opinions and atti...damo you said:<BR/>Freedom to express opinions and attitudes without attracting the attention of the mob. ...<BR/>and<BR/>I'm not talking about "freedom of speech," I'm talking about "freedom."<BR/>===========================<BR/>damon,<BR/>one cannot go on national tv and expect to not attract attention from your so called 'mob'. nobody forced him to bring this attention to himself by appearing on the show. that was his free choice.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13025710719503505963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-6957169925025631862009-02-03T16:06:00.001-08:002009-02-03T16:06:00.001-08:00damo, there's much more to being a good parent tha...damo, there's much more to being a good parent than providing the best education and private lessons money can buy. the main duty of a parent is to teach their child how to be a good person; to teach them empathy and humility, ie concern for someone other than just themselves. to help them develop a conscience.<BR/><BR/>freedom of speech as cited in the constitution actually has to do with freedom of political speech. it as nothing to do with being free of criticism for behaving badly in public.<BR/><BR/>he hasn't committed any physical violence, but words can be swords.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13025710719503505963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-60583709068467225092009-02-03T16:06:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:06:00.000-08:00So if the woman who lives with him feels this way....So if the woman who lives with him feels this way.. why is Damo still defending him (self).Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18282986353804743917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-813646428107565612009-02-03T16:05:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:05:00.000-08:00Renee has now made a public statement of apology a...Renee has now made a public statement of apology and has said that she is appalled by her husbands behavior and she has asked him to get professional help.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18282986353804743917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-66489628843424278572009-02-03T16:04:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:04:00.000-08:00More for Damo & StephenGo into Rehab; discuss ...More for Damo & Stephen<BR/><BR/>Go into Rehab; discuss how alcohol has ruined your life and you are now setting out on a sober path.<BR/><BR/>After leaving Rehab, donate money for a paintball scholarship at University of Missouri (Mizzou). After all, even Gordon Ramsey plays paintball - he's darn good at it - and he makes more money in a week than the Fowler's earn in a year. Discuss how there are many new sports that have benefited from scholarship funding, such as synchronized swimming, and how the students benefit from the scholarships.<BR/><BR/>Volunteer to help women getting off of welfare write their resumes and fill out job applications. Bring your kids along. Renee can offer weight loss guidance while they are there.<BR/><BR/>Remember the power of the press release; more than 85% of news stories result from press releases from interest groups, corporations, and others. The media will be interested.yakimabellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16240548612502961431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-59656350716773388202009-02-03T16:02:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:02:00.000-08:00I'm not talking about "freedom of speech," I'm tal...I'm not talking about "freedom of speech," I'm talking about "freedom."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-61480853783341799502009-02-03T16:00:00.000-08:002009-02-03T16:00:00.000-08:00Damo said...He's extremely dedicated to his childr...Damo said...He's extremely dedicated to his children and most likely a better parent than the vast majority who are criticizing him.<BR/><BR/>Please don't say that, "most likely a better parent", you have no idea what kind of parents are on this board. You are losing credibility with your insults.<BR/><BR/> OK, this is what I think needs to happen, then this will all go away. I need Gayla Long to make a post, blog, whatever. If Gayla states that Mr.Fowler was infact a victim of poor editing and that the viewer was mislead, I will forget all this. I would even write apology letters to his affiliates, her clients etc. Because If I were Gayla Long and seen this happening, and he was a victim, I would never be able to take a back seat.cykahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18089142289853207346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-38729073436022433352009-02-03T15:37:00.000-08:002009-02-03T15:37:00.000-08:00Damo,First you still have not address anything I h...Damo,<BR/><BR/>First you still have not address anything I have posted. Including your own misuse of the words imply/infer while complaining about others' English skills.<BR/><BR/>Second, America does support the Freedom of Speech. But the freedom is the freedom of speech is the freedom from gov't stopping your free speech. NOT freedom from private reprecussions of your own use of free speech.<BR/><BR/>People can still voice thier own opinion towards another's opinion. <BR/><BR/>What is happening to Stephen (OTHER than the threats) is all part of freedom of speech. Just as Stephen has the freedom to say what he wants to anyone, so does everyone else.<BR/><BR/>Everyone else is just expressing their opinion to Stephen, to his employers, and to the world.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03556352465277185627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-85909508177040762222009-02-03T15:24:00.000-08:002009-02-03T15:24:00.000-08:00Freedom to express opinions and attitudes without ...Freedom to express opinions and attitudes without attracting the attention of the mob. ...<BR/><BR/>Stephen is being pilloried. His business interests are being attacked. <BR/><BR/>He hasn't committed any violence. He's a peaceable guy. Just has strong opinions which are distasteful to many.<BR/><BR/>He's extremely dedicated to his children and most likely a better parent than the vast majority who are criticizing him.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-34956021621849677452009-02-03T15:15:00.000-08:002009-02-03T15:15:00.000-08:00sure damo, stephen has the freedom to be offensive...sure damo, stephen has the freedom to be offensive. and we have the freedom to take offense, and call him on it.<BR/><BR/>is stephen aware of what he taught his children those two weeks? he did teach them some very bad lessons, that will not serve them well in life.<BR/><BR/>you see, children learn what they live, and what these children lived during those two weeks is that's it's ok to be disrespectful and rude to a guest if you think they are beneath you and unworthy in some way. they learned to judge someone based on their perceived level of education and intellect. they learned that one should divide ones associations based on 'class' or lack there of, and if you feel that someone around you doesn't measure up they should be berated and then ignored. they learned to not look for the good in someone, and see what they have to offer, but to find every fault possible.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13025710719503505963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-76754134938226353252009-02-03T15:03:00.000-08:002009-02-03T15:03:00.000-08:00AMERICA claims to stand for FREEDOM.Freedom means ...AMERICA claims to stand for FREEDOM.<BR/><BR/>Freedom means the freedom to be offensive or it means nothing at all.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-41474565826731993032009-02-03T14:15:00.000-08:002009-02-03T14:15:00.000-08:00WhiteTrashBodhisattva wrote:Wife Swap message boar...WhiteTrashBodhisattva wrote:<BR/><BR/>Wife Swap message board had this...I thougt it was funny:<BR/><BR/>It's possible that this is a rogue site built by one of the many people that Stephen managed to offend:<BR/><BR/>Rednecks<BR/><BR/>People in the military<BR/><BR/>People who have someone they love in the military<BR/><BR/>Overweight people<BR/><BR/>People who enjoy Paintball<BR/><BR/>People who enjoy AT vehicles<BR/><BR/>People who enjoy GoCarts<BR/><BR/>People who live in and call themselves Americans<BR/><BR/>People who like Fast Food<BR/><BR/>People with opinions as strong as his<BR/><BR/>People who didn't go to college.<BR/><BR/>Did I leave anyone out? It's broad base and it's not inconceivable that someone who's really computer savvy decided to retailiate from his/her own area of expertise.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Well, WhiteTrashBodhisattva, from reading the Internet, it appears Stephen and Renee offended at least these additional groups:<BR/><BR/>business leaders<BR/>investors<BR/>consumers<BR/>physicians<BR/>attorneys<BR/>intellectuals<BR/>dietitians and nutritionists<BR/>academics<BR/>engineers<BR/>librarians<BR/>schoolteachers<BR/>Brits<BR/>French<BR/>environmentalists<BR/>liberals<BR/>San Franciscans<BR/>registered nurses<BR/>MBAs<BR/>Oxbridge graduatesyakimabellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16240548612502961431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-69390647735784010062009-02-03T14:01:00.000-08:002009-02-03T14:01:00.000-08:00Anyway, it could have been far worse for Stephen; ...Anyway, it could have been far worse for Stephen; imagine what would have happened had Mrs. Long been a member of a minority religion or of a different race. He could have had dozens of confused suburban adolescents painting encircled "A"s on his sidewalk and smashing all the windows up and down the street. I certainly wouldn't want the spoiled children of the bourgeoisie annoyed with me. They do the sort of damage that causes the neighbors and one's own social set to hate you.yakimabellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16240548612502961431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-20355303478930196742009-02-03T13:33:00.000-08:002009-02-03T13:33:00.000-08:00To Hollis Polk:Since you posted "More Lessons...To Hollis Polk:<BR/><BR/>Since you posted "More Lessons from Wife Swap (& its aftermath,) your blog's received 298 comments, all of them are negative towards you and Fowler. I stand correctly, all are negative except the ones Stephen posted himself, and those were pathetic.<BR/><BR/>What infuriated me about you in your original blog was not so much that because you are Fowler's friend, you attempted to defend him. It was the WAY in which you wrote your defense. <BR/><BR/>Before I read your blog, I'd seen the show so I had some indication of the Fowler's social life. As I read your blog, I could visualize the scene. In my mind's eye before the show begins, I see a group of group of people in expensive casual attire sipping wine (or perhaps imported beer), absently picking at trays of various cheeses and organic crudites while engaging in inane conversation consisting of the guests trying to trump the others with their witty humor.<BR/><BR/>But wait...you live on the West Coast. At 9PM EST, it's only 6PM PST. The entire East Coast has seen the show, and most are enraged. It's easy to find the Fowler's phone number because they have it plastered all over the internet, so the phone calls telling Stephen a pompous, cruel, piece of excrement have begun pouring in most likely BEFORE their guests have arrived. <BR/><BR/>So tell me Hollis, were you and Scott hysterical with laughter before you saw the program or afterwards? Did the Fowlers shut off their phones before or after the program began on the West Coast? <BR/><BR/>Also Hollis, after seeing the program, were the Fowler's friends still laughing? You make it seem as though they were. So what is it? Were you and Scott the only ones amused by Stephen's cruel treatment of Mrs. Long, or was everyone taking part in supporting this little creature? I can't bring myself to call him a man.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-30149169838180570672009-02-03T13:12:00.000-08:002009-02-03T13:12:00.000-08:00hollis, you left out the real lesson - treat every...hollis, you left out the real lesson - treat everyone with respect, especially if you're going to be on national tv and don't want the rest of the world to 'misunderstand' you.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13025710719503505963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-43670600381881320242009-02-03T12:52:00.000-08:002009-02-03T12:52:00.000-08:00" Damo Kawasaki said...To Saphirz,because the show..." Damo Kawasaki said...<BR/><BR/>To Saphirz,<BR/><BR/>because the show is about lifestyles and that is what she's interested in.<BR/><BR/>The only thing Stephen watches on TV are Chelsea games and to make matters worse for him they lost 2-0 to Liverpool on Sunday! He didn't know what he was letting himself in for"<BR/><BR/>What? You mean his higher intelligence can not comprehend what he gets himself into?<BR/><BR/>Come on Stephen, you are getting yours now! Amazing what influence us Podunk Americans have on America's business's!<BR/><BR/>Even if the show managed to capture you at your worst,your actions and words far out weigh (pun intended) any good qualities you MIGHT posses. Good residence manUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10815151689515339781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-87203282089929765612009-02-03T12:49:00.000-08:002009-02-03T12:49:00.000-08:00This comment has been removed by the author.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10815151689515339781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-61014858822620367522009-02-03T12:34:00.000-08:002009-02-03T12:34:00.000-08:00By the by.If what ABC did was really slanderous Mr...By the by.If what ABC did was really slanderous Mr. Fowler may avail himself of the American judicial system. Indeed our standards are quite a bit higher than in the UK -- however he can easily show harm so if ABC really did put words in his mouth he can sue for damages.<BR/><BR/>I'm willing to bet that ABC knew this episode would be a real firecracker and they gave it over to their legal department first and they have even more offensive comments just waiting to release in the event of a jury trial. Mr. Fowler so befouled the jury pool that it will be difficult to get anything out of ABC.<BR/><BR/>That's my bet.Apolloniushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12276810029052418383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-40499898975249106632009-02-03T12:30:00.000-08:002009-02-03T12:30:00.000-08:00"Show me your friends and I'll tell you who you ar..."Show me your friends and I'll tell you who you are".clcjbhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05682983033922923150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9539724.post-65998714069154149112009-02-03T12:13:00.000-08:002009-02-03T12:13:00.000-08:00"You don't know Stephen and so have no grounds for..."You don't know Stephen and so have no grounds for saying he "is a total and complete jackass."<BR/><BR/>What was presented on Wife Swap was partial and misleading and I'm surprised more ire hasn't been directed at abc for treating Stephen in such a calculating and ruthless way."<BR/><BR/>sorry but I only have so much ire and it was reserved for the things you I mean steve actually said and did.<BR/><BR/>what pressure could he possibly be under? I've have cameras in my face before, I've been in houses with people I disagree with politically and probably had educational differences with them, I never resorted to calling them names or insulting them if they asked if I had a nice time. nor have I ignored them when they tried to be civil. if I did loose my cool I was quick to apologize, quick to learn from it and quick never to do it again. thats the key. no editing excused the repeated abuses that flew out of that fools mouth.isignedupcuzihatefowlerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10458528832486544156noreply@blogger.com