Was the Oak Creek shooting a random act?

I feel sick. Literally. I just heard about the death of the father of a friend of a friend. I'm sure you heard about it, too  -- the shooting at the Oak Creek Sikh temple. (Amazing how small the world is, huh?)

There is a back story here -- one you are not going to hear on the nightly news. I think the mass murder in Oak Creek happened to prevent a documentary film from being made. Here's the story:

Dr. Steven Greer, who started the disclosure movement, has had numerous attempts on his life over the years, because he has brought forward hundreds of credible witnesses to the fact that extra-terrestrials are here, and because he ties this to the suppression of technology. Because I am one of his students, I was present at one of the threats, if not an exact attempt (no shots were fired) -- so I know this is no joke and no exaggeration. 

Amardeep Kaleka, an Emmy-winning documentary film producer, had signed on with Dr. Steven Greer, to produce a feature-length movie about Dr. Greer's work. As the website for the movie says,

"This film exposes the greatest story never told:

• The Earth has been visited by people from other worlds who are not malicious, but in fact concerned for the future of humanity.
• A cabal of military, industrial and financial interests have kept this contact and what we have learned from it secret for over 60 years.
• Their secrecy is meant to suppress the knowledge that can liberate the world from the yoke of oil, gas, coal and nuclear power and replace the current world order with one of New Energy and true Freedom."

I understand that threats had been made on the life of Amardeep and his family. This was gossip, though, I have no proof.

 Amardeep's father, Satwant, was the head of the Oak Creek temple. He died a hero, trying to stop the shooter.

Here is how I back up my supposition:

Right after the shooting, there were said to be several shooters. That was later changed to just one. Satwant Kaleka was tackling the shooter, and he was shot in the back. If there were only one shooter, that means he was shot by a cop, right? No one, however, is talking about who shot him. How come?

Also, I note that Kaleka's name was originally on the NY Times website -- and is no longer there. How come?

Reframing Death

Through the magic of Facebook, I have learned that 2 acquaintances, both women in their 50s, have died recently.  My heart goes out to family and friends of each.

One was a woman who went to my high school. She was a couple of years behind me, so although I knew who she was (she was really out there, and hard to miss), I didn't really know her.

The other was a woman I met at a professional conference 2 years ago, and had gotten to know a bit on Facebook. She was always kind, and often funny. She often commented on my daily 'morning walk'  photos. I didn't really notice that she stopped commenting a month or two ago, and then I was shocked to see a post about her memorial service.

Then another friend said that two of her friends had gone recently. These were really friends, and she was sad about their crossing over, missing them. I reminded her that there is ample evidence that the soul survives the death of the body (see Twenty Cases Suggestive of Reincarnation, by Ian Stevenson, M.D. Stevenson found over 2500 cases, but only 20 are chronicled.) After you look at all that info, it's pretty hard to deny the reality of an eternal soul.

If you have a soul, and your friend has a soul, then it comes down to a communication problem. Most embodied humans have a hard time speaking with non-embodied souls. This makes missing someone more a communication problem than anything else.

Think of it this way: a little more than a century ago, if someone moved from the 'old country' to the US, or even from the Eastern seabord to the frontier, that person might never see his family again. If that person or his family were quite poor, perhaps illiterate, he might never even hear from his family again. So today, communicating with 'the other side' is not so different from communicating with someone on the other side of the world back then. In fact, we can use technology to communicate with those on the 'other side'.  

So I've been thinking about what we call 'death' lately. 

Then I was lying flat on my back in 'corpse pose' in yoga class yesterday, with the yoga teacher talking about breath, when it hit me that death is just another word for release.

Looked at from the soul's point of view, death is simply the soul releasing the body that housed it. The soul that held the molecules that made up the body in place, allows those molecules to release all the elements in them to be reused. (It's called decay, but really, it's recycling.)

This is true for non-physical deaths, too.

While you can say a romantic relationship dies, from the point of view of each of the partners, it's simply releasing the attachment to the other person. This leaves each person free to use the energy that held the relationship in place for other things -- career, home, other relationships.

While you can say that a company that files Chapter 7 bankruptcy dies, what actually happens is that the parts are released to other entities. For example, hard assets can be sold off -- released -- to other people or companies.

Even software has deaths -- updated versions are called releases!

So if someone 'dies', while it is quite natural to miss the easy communication you had with someone, you might consider learning to communicate telepathically. If someone or something dies, you might consider how to use the energy and/or material that has been released in a new way.

Sen. Paul Wellstone's Death, or, Know What You Know

Did you ever have that niggling feeling that you knew something, but you couldn't quite put your finger on it? Or maybe you had the feeling that you weren't being told the whole story, or worse, an outright lie, but when you brought up your doubts, everyone told you you were nuts?

Those things happen to me, with fair regularity, but it can take quite a while -- years, decades, sometimes -- to find out I was right. Here's one of those stories, but it's going to take a little while to get there.

I grew up in NJ, at the Jersey shore (yes, there is a group of people who are really like that; I avoided them like the plague). In fact, I grew up at northernmost end of the Jersey Shore, quite close to NYC, where rum running was invented. (During Prohibition, booze was smuggled in by ship to the north Jersey shore, which was one of the ways the Mafia made money, and grew powerful.)

This really was Mafia country. So when I was a kid, and someone had a light plane accident, or a boating accident, we knew it wasn't really an accident. I mean, even 10-year-olds knew that.

Which brings me to Paul Wellstone.

When he died in a 'light plane accident', I strongly suspected it wasn't an accident. And there were some plausible theories about the balance of power in the Senate a a motive for murder, yadda yadda yadda. But those didn't really explain it.

Last night, I was reading my most recent Harvard Magazine, and I came across this, in an article about Sen. Al Franken.

"Paul Wellstone didn’t mind taking unpopular positions. In 1990, his first year as junior U.S. senator from Minnesota, he voted against the Gulf War. President George H.W. Bush’s reaction: “Who is that chickenshit?” An equal-opportunity offender, Wellstone was the only Democrat to vote against President Bill Clinton’s welfare-reform bill. And when the second Bush administration was rounding up votes for an invasion of Iraq, Wellstone said he heard from Vice President Dick Cheney: “If you vote against the war in Iraq, the Bush administration will do whatever is necessary to get you. There will be severe ramifications for you and the state of Minnesota.”

Wellstone voted against the war, but Cheney never had to retaliate. On October 25, 2002—just two weeks after the Senate vote—a plane carrying Wellstone, his wife, his daughter, two aides, and two pilots crashed in northern Minnesota."

Umm, Cheney never had to retaliate??? Huh? If a guy is willing to shoot his hunting partner in the face, what do you suppose he'd do to a guy he didn't like?

So there it is, right there in black and white for everyone to see. All you have to read is the first 2 paragraphs, though the rest of the story is wonderful. (The author, Jesse Kornbluth, is no slouch, having written for New York Times, New York, Vanity Fair, Architectural Digest and more.  So I assume journalistic competence here, that he isn't making this up.)

Here's what gets me: At least one person, who knew about the threat and was willing to talk about, lived to talk about it. That means this mass murder was meant as a message to someone else. Ever wonder why the Republicans walk in lockstep?


My larger point is this: while you do have to listen to what is out there, what other people think, hang on to that niggling sense that all those people may be wrong, and you might just be right.

Meeting Jessica's Mom

There is a moral to this story, but I don't want to give it away, so please read all the way to the bottom.

If you've ever been out with me, you know that I'll pet anything on four paws that will let me. I look to see if they're friendly, and if they are, I get into rapport with them. Part of getting into rapport is getting down on their level and letting them smell my breath by almost touching my nose with theirs.

Yesterday, I was on my usual walk, when I came upon a woman walking 2 small white dogs. They were both friendly, wagging their tails as they approached me excitedly. As I got down on their level, both came even closer. I reached to pet both of them, and then let them smell my nose. The Jack Russell terrier began to bark and growl, so I rocketed back up to standing position.

Their human apologized, saying that Woody had been a bit aggressive since, well, "I lost my daughter recently."

"I'm so sorry,"  I answered.

Then, before I could say anything else, she said, "Jessica died in the explosion", that is, the PG&E gas line explosion in San Bruno about a month ago. And then it hit me...

Woody didn't know what happened -- Jessica died suddenly, outside Woody's presence -- and he was a little freaked out. These were partly Jessica's dogs -- she walked them often and was home with them during the day when mom was at work. So now Woody is alone during the day, and he's wondering, what happened to Jessica? Why isn't she here? and perhaps feeling a bit abandoned.

I told Jessica's mom that she needed to explain to Woody what had happened. She could do this by sitting quietly with him (even waiting till he was asleep if necessary) and telling him, or telepathically showing him pictures of Jessica going into the light.

So the moral of the story is this: you never know when -- or how -- you'll be of service.

4 Ways to Deal with Death and other Losses

My sweet Creature, my faithful companion of more than 18 years, aka 'the reading kitty', left her body a week ago. She loved nothing more than literally being on me, sitting in my lap while I did client sessions (An animal communicator once told me that Creature thought she was getting a healing each time.) She was fine till two days before she checked out (the vet gave her an AOK about 3 weeks previously), then suddenly had a hard time walking and finally didn't want water. I knew the end was near, and she breathed her last while in my arm, immediately after a reading. [If you're reading this on Facebook, many thanks for your thoughts, stories and prayers. I'm not rehashing old ground, rather, I'm sharing what I've learned from the experience.]

The experience got me thinking about the human experience of loss, what makes it so difficult and how to make it easier. I see four issues/remedies. The first two are for just about any loss of a person/relationship -- a romantic or marriage breakup,  a child going off to college, going into the military or just moving out, the ending of a friendship due to betrayal, and of course, your garden variety 'death', that is, one of sickness or old age, or even accident. [Murders feel very different -- trust me, one of my friends was murdered a while back.] The second two really relate only to 'death'. 

Issue 1 - Cords:  When you have an intense and/or long-term relationship with someone, your energy bodies (that is, the electromagnetic fields we all have) create electromagnetic connections with each other. These are  called 'cords' because they literally look like cords of energy between the two of you. This is why we say things like "my heart goes out to you" -- we have created an energy cord between our hearts. When one of you drops your physical body, or ends the relationship abruptly (even if it's planned), the cords, and their connections to your energy body are abruptly torn, leaving holes in your energy field. This is generally interpreted as emotional pain, though in truth, it's quasi-physical (one of the layers of the electromagentic body is emotional). This will usually heal in time, because bodies do know how to heal themselves. You can also intentionally heal the holes through visualization (call me at 888-4-hollis if you want help).

Issue 2 - Triggers: When you see your pet's favorite chair -- now empty, or hear 'our song', or catch the waft of a familiar cologne on the breeze, or taste Grandma's madeleine,  it can trigger a strong memory of the relationship you used to have. What you do with that memory, how you compare it to what exists in the present, and how often you access that comparison affects your experience of the loss. If you only compare what was (which you liked) to what is -- and label that change 'missing', you are probably going to be miserable. One really simple solution to this: if you are constantly experiencing the comparison, and finding it unpleasant, just 'Be here now" -- focus your attention in the present.

Since memories are carried holographically in our energy field, you can change them. What you do is  change yourself, your energy field, to match what is, not what was.  (Again, call me at 888-4-hollis if you want help, because there are specific NLP ways to deal with triggers).

Issue 3 - Beliefs: Many people have the mistaken notion that mourning, feeling bad, somehow honors the dead. Nothing could be further from the truth. Why would someone you love want you to suffer? This is the experience of one of my clients, who is also a medium. He says he's had multiple encounters with those on the other side, who say, 'please tell my loved on to move on -- I want him/her to be happy.'

If you truly believe your loved one is in a better place,  then you should be happy for him/her -- and the only person you are feeling bad for is you. And you can change that -- see (1) and (2) above.

Issue 4 - Transcommunication:  Which brings us to communication with the other side. Yesterday, I 'got' that Creature wanted to show me how much she loved me, and I could feel her little paws on my thighs as I sat. Now that I know she's fine, I'm fine. So do your best to communicate across the veil, and if you need help to do it, get help.

Death & Halloween

The current merry celebration of Halloween -- the costumes, the candy, the decorations with simulated ghosts and skulls -- belies a deeper truth. I'll get to that in a minute, after a brief detour. 

What we call 'death' is simply the release of the eternal soul from the physical body. That is, the soul doesn't die, it just continues on without a physical instrument. If you aren't yet convinced, then go here, read some of the info (there's a lot!), and follow some or all of the links. Another great source is here. A great, easy to read book is Twenty Cases Suggestive of Reincarnation, by Ian Stevenson, M.D (Stevenson found over 2500, but only 20 are chronicled). After you look at all that info, it's pretty hard to deny the reality of an eternal soul.

That soul, without a body, may or may not be able to perceive things in physical reality -- we don't really know, and it may vary from soul to soul. The lack of a body also makes it really hard to communicate with most humans, because the emodied humans aren't capable of non-physical perception. So you can think of the 'death' of a loved one as a change of state. You miss that person more because of a lack of communication skills on your part than anything else. 

Back a little more than a century ago, if someone moved from the 'old country' to the US, or from the Eastern seabord to the frontier, that person might never see his family again. If that person or his family were quite poor, he might never speak to them again, either. So today, communicating across 'the veil', is not so different from communicating across the Atlantic back then. In fact, we can use technology to communicate with those on the 'other side. 

What does his have to do with Halloween? According to Wikipedia, the word, Halloween (or Hallowe'en), comes from All-Hallows-Even ("evening"), that is, the night before All Hallows Day. 

Further, Halloween is 

"linked to the Celtic festival of Samhain, whose original spelling was Samuin (pronounced sow-an or sow-in)".The name is derived from Old Irish and means roughly "summer's end"...   The festival of Samhain celebrates the end of the "lighter half" of the year and beginning of the "darker half", and is sometimes regarded as the "Celtic New Year".

"The ancient Celts believed that the border between this world and the Otherworld became thin on Samhain, allowing spirits (both harmless and harmful) to pass through. The family's ancestors were honored and invited home while harmful spirits were warded off. It is believed that the need to ward off harmful spirits led to the wearing of costumes and masks. Their purpose was to disguise oneself as a harmful spirit and thus avoid harm. In Scotland the spirits were impersonated by young men dressed in white with masked, veiled or blackened faces. 

"Another common practice was divination, which often involved the use of food and drink.

So if you're going to try to contact a loved one who is 'on the other side', this weekend would be the time to do it! 

(And if you're really missing a loved one, I can help you with that. I'm not a medium, but I can help you with the 'missing' part, the longing. Give me a call at 888-4-hollis, which is 888-446-5547.)

The 5 Stages of Transformation

Lately I've been 'seeing' a ridiculous number of relationships ending, mostly among my clients, but among friends, as well. The relationships vary: marriages, lovers, friends, siblings, coworkers, a man and his job, a woman and her home. And I've noticed that the pattern remains the same. Often I can see that it's really over before my clients do. Why?

It's because the pattern is obvious to me, partly because I've seen it so many times, and partly thanks to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross (On Death and Dying (Scribner Classics), who identified it in terminally ill patients in the 1960's. The pattern she identified, consisting of the stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, really applies to any death -- death of a relationship, losing a job, losing a home, etc. All deaths precede a transformation; after all, physical death is the ultimate transformation. Conversely, it seems that all transformation is preceded by a death, even if that is the death of a single belief.

For a relationship, the five stages go something like this: He isn't really ignoring me, he's just working really hard (denial). How dare he stay out so late -- three nights a week? How dare he treat me like this? Is there another woman? (anger) Maybe if I lose weight, and cook a good dinner for him every night, and don't mention my suspicions (which he denies), then maybe he'll come home to me (bargaining). Can't I do anything right? Am I not good enough for him? I'm so depressed, I can barely get out of bed in the morning to go to work. I have to force myself to smile at him (depression). Oh, I get it, he really is out of this relationship -- he's been seeing another woman for six months. Now what do I do? (acceptance)

For the loss of a job, the five stages might go like this: I know there are going to be layoffs, but it won't happen to me (denial). Maybe if I do an extra project, I can make myself so essential that it won't happen to me (bargaining). I got laid off! How dare they do that to me, after 10 (or 15 or 20 or 45) years of service? (anger) What did I do wrong? Why is this happening to me? Who am I without this job? I can't bear to even look for a job, I'm so upset (depression).  How am I going to survive? What do I do next? (acceptance)

The stages don't necessarily go in neat order. It's quite common to bounce back and forth between, say, denial and anger, anger and bargaining, anger and depression, or depression and acceptance.   

If you're in one of the stages of loss, i.e the stages of transformation, what can you do about it? If you're in denial, not much, because you don't know what you don't know. The good news is -- that can only last so long, because something, perhaps a physical ailment will call your attention to the impending transformation.

Once you get to the stage of anger, there is something you can do. You have to ask yourself, what specifically am I angry about? What am I pretending not to know that keeps me here? What is my part in this? Is there an internal change I can make? When you change, aka transform, your reactions will be different, so the world, including the relationship, will be different.

If you are already at the stage of bargaining, there is a different set of questions. If you are having to bargain to keep something, you have to ask yourself if you want it badly enough to do all the extra work. Maybe the answer is yes; maybe not. In my experience, though, once you are even at this stage, it's really over. It may take years for the whole thing to play out -- you can bounce back and forth between denial (everything's okay) and anger and bargaining (we hit a rough patch again) for a long time. Occasionally, in a lover or marriage relationship especially, the bargaining forces a real change in one or both of the parties, so the relationship transforms, but without breaking up. 

The difficult thing about depression is that a lot of times, people get there without even knowing what specifically depresses them. People will often medicate themselves out of the feeling of sadness or depression,  with cigarettes, alcohol, or legal or illegal drugs, without ever dealing with the underlying issue. (I'm not a doctor, but I do understand that there are some depressions that are purely chemical, that is, from neurological problems; brains that don't produce normal amounts of certain chemicals. I'm not talking about these people.) You have to deal with the underlying situation. Sometimes it's obvious. Sometimes you really have to think back to what triggered the feeling.

It helps to ask yourself what you lost, or what you fear losing (though if you're here, it's probably already lost). And what you lost doesn't have to be a person, or a job, or a thing. It can be just an idea or a belief -- and sometimes these are the most profound triggers of transformation. When you lose something (or someone), it's important to ask what you have instead, because that points in the direction of hope or actions you can take to move into acceptance of the change.

When you realize what is going on, you can consciously choose to move through these stages.  By asking the questions above, as well as others unique to your situation, you can shorten the time frames of the stages of transformation. You can see the glimmer of acceptance, and a new situation, even as far back as the stage of anger.

If you want help moving through your particular situation more quickly and easily, please call me at 888-4-hollis (888-446-5547) to discuss options.

Dying for Health Care

What's the difference between the outpouring of support for the Haitians after the earthquake, and the inability of our Congress to support American citizens with a bill providing health care for all?

It's the video, stupid.

We are deluged with videos of Haitians dying on the streets of Port-Au-Prince, their screams heard around the world. We see bodies piled by the side of the road, and mass graves being dug by backhoes. In the midst of this, doctors talk about preventable deaths.

There are 46,000 preventable deaths each year in the US, too. When the US story is told, however, all we see is town hall meetings -- people talking in a hearing room, tearfully telling stories about how their mother, or brother, or daughter, died because they couldn't get health care. Yes, their emotion carries, but it does not have the gut wrenching impact that it would have if those deaths were seen.

What we need is uninsured people dying on the Capitol steps, both in Washington, DC and in every state capitol, as well as the Federal Buildings in New York City and Los Angeles, to shame our government into passing universal health care. We need brave people, who want their deaths to count for something, to volunteer to die in public. (I realize this may be thought macabre, but the idea was born more of desperation than anything else.)

We need their families there with them to tell their stories, because the dying probably can't.

We need videographers to document these deaths, and put them up on YouTube, because the corporate media won't carry these stories until they are shamed into it by the viral nature of the 'amateur' videos.

We need an attorney to write a statement for the dying to sign, that they are volunteering to die in public, of their own free will, in order to protect those supporting them from any prosecution. We will probably need other attorneys to support these families, in case they are arrested for their civil disobedience. (Though it's difficult to imagine the police arresting a dying woman.)

We need other volunteers to support these brave souls, to provide care for the dying, and to provide logistical assistance.

So, if you know someone who is dying because of their lack of health insurance, ask that person, "Do you want your death to count for something?" and get into action.

"If the people lead, the leaders will follow."
Mahatma Gandhi

[This vison was given to meby by guides a couple of years ago. I never mentioned it to anyone. A couple of days ago, I 'saw' it again, and this time, I told my husband, who suggested I write it. Please don't shoot me, I'm just the messenger.]

I must have hit a nerve

Last week’s article (see it at http://10minutesaday.blogspot.com/2008/03/death-is-another-country.html ) must have hit a nerve, because it provoked more response than any article in a long time. I’m including a selection of what I received in return below.

I went to the memorial service that Dan’s spiritual community (of which I am a member) held for him. We all just sat in a (huge) circle and members offered memories of him as they felt moved to speak. It was touching to hear, and to hear the members caring for each other. I was blown away by the poise of his two young adult children, who articulated their gratitude for the community’s role in their father’s life, and who seemed to be very positive in the face of this really difficult circumstance.

Here’s an odd thing. One woman who was at the service told me her brother had died the day before the service, and another told me her 104 year old grandmother had died two days before it. Given the notes below, I really wonder if we have entered the times of change that have been predicted by so many traditions for so long.

Hollis

I've had two friend die in 5 days - there have been 3 suicides in three weeks out here in West Marin - my friend who lives in
a small community on the Trinity River tells me there have been 40 deaths since December in their tiny community mostly accidents some
suicides and sudden onset illness. Astrologically we are in a time of great transformation and shift - many souls will choose to leave at this
point.

RC

A very good friend of mine died almost two weeks ago. And I think death is simply giving up the illusion of darkness. We are all light whether in this dimension or another; energy and love. I think we re-fold back into the light of the divine spark within ourselves, back into the universe as we 1st knew it, before we entered this dimension in another state of transformation. You know the rest...its love without in or out; top or bottom - as for my friend, in remembrance of her I close my correspondences with 'Savor the moment,' because that was her way. Her life was so full I could almost taste it whenever I was with her. She was my best friend's mother and a surrogate mom. She was a cancer survivor of 23 years.

So its ironic reading your email. These have been my thoughts. Thanks for the chance to share them.

Be well and savor the moment - no matter what it is. I pray the good ones last long and the sad ones pass quickly.

Kathy Lavine

And it, too, hit me like a ton of bricks. I did have a number of very sweet interactions with him, and, as you put in a much more eloquent way, it really hits close to home. Hard when people around our age die, especially those that we know. I am very sad about it -

KK

I cried for the loss of Dan when I read this, and still am. There must be something special about him that touches people's hearts. Another of my immediate thoughts about him was that he was only 50 and apparently healthy--and that does hit very close to home. It really could happen to any of us, and for those of us who live alone--like Dan--we might not even be missed right away. I guess we need these reminders so we'll make the most of life while we have it.
LW

[I think that when people die alone, they are actually giving the rest of us a huge gift. Why? Because we’re fine between the time they leave their bodies and the time we find out about it, which means that we already know, at a very deep level, that we can be okay without them around. H.]

Your description of Dan’s passing is so wonderful. He was a wonderful guy and I did know and appreciate him a lot. He also liked me a lot. That’s the part that makes it sweet and sad, bittersweet.

I just wonder, if everyone thought this person in my life may not be here tomorrow, would I treat them better? Would maybe transform our planet. Thanks so much for your thoughtfulness and eloquence.

I knew Dan was going to go in this way, I just did not know when. I spoke with [a mutual friend] last week, and she asked if I knew someone who could benefit from her [health] coaching program and I said, yes, Dan would, he really needs your help. I've done this before with countless others. Its cool, spooky and scary all at the same time.

I'm not sure what do to with the information when I have it.

CC

I met a man recently who works with the Mayans. The real deal. I understand that 100's of thousands of people will be leaving their bodies rather abruptly in the coming years. We need to learn how to be open to this as not being a "bad" thing. And, if it were my friend, I'd be mourning too.

AL

Death is Another Country

I heard the news today oh boy
About a lucky man who made the change

(To paraphrase the Beatles)

So another friend left his body rather permanently. I heard the news from a mutual friend. Dan was in his mid-50s, with a grown son and a college-age daughter. He wasn’t sick, except he apparently went home with the flu on Friday... and was never heard from again. On Tuesday, when his business partner couldn’t get in touch with him, he began to worry, went to his house, found his car there, but no answer at the door or on the phone. He called the cops who got in, and...

Dan was more of an acquaintance than a friend, someone with whom I meditated, and took part in group, and occasionally personal, discussions about the nature of reality and the highest good. I respected his insight, his balanced view of life, his eloquence — and his good heart. He was always the first to open his arms for a hug, and the first to burst into a hearty laugh. And I really liked him. But he wasn’t someone I ever called for a personal reason, his or mine.

Dan was one of the angels in this earthly bar, the ones who come and go, as we all do, who enter through the swinging doors (take a body), have a drink, some food, hook up, break up, maybe play a game of poker, or pour a beer for someone else, watch the dramas unfolding, and leave again through those same swinging doors.

So why am I so upset?

I mean, this is as upsetting to me as when my good friend, Charlotte, checked out a few months ago (see http://10minutesaday.blogspot.com/2007/11/so-this-angel-walks-into-bar.html ). But of course, at some level, I expected her to leave, just didn’t know when, and so I was pretty complete with her. And I was most definitely not complete with Dan. I really regret that I didn’t get to know this very cool person better.

Does that explain this level of upset?

As I check inside, I find a sort of energetic steel tube in my core, which I move out of me so that I can talk with it. The first thing it says is, ‘there, but for the grace of God, go I’. It’s true — we can all leave the bar at any time. I’m pretty clear that Dan was complete on some level, and he’s probably having a blast exploring new realms, whatever is outside the swinging doors. So leaving the bar doesn’t sound so bad. But on the other hand, who knows when I’ll find another body to inhabit? And they say that Earth is a destination planet because of its beauty.

I guess I have to get used to it... People, my friends, are going to leave the bar with regular, and probably increasing, frequency. That means I have three choices.

The first is to mourn.

The second choice is to learn to be a clearer medium, so that I can still talk to them. I think of it like this: death is another country. What do I mean? Three or four generations ago, in the 19th century, when someone left their village in Russia to come to America, they could have no expectation of ever going back to visit. Nor could they count on the relatives that they left behind ever coming to America. Communication was pretty minimal, too. This was before the telephone. They had letters, of course, but those were quite slow, possibly expensive, and probably infrequent. Today, when someone dies, it’s like we’re in Russia and he or she went to America. There aren’t any letters, but there are mediums, who may be expensive and whom I’ll only call infrequently. If I develop my mediumistic abilities, it’ll be like having a telephone would have been in the 19th century — not as good as having the person with you, but way better than no communication at all. And eventually, I know I’ll go to America, too.

The third choice is to focus on the angels still in the bar, to love them, and appreciate them, and see one leaving as an opportunity to get to know another.

How Psychics Have Fun (Part 3)

Last weekend, I had the privilege of hosting Mark Macy (www.spiritfaces.com) and his Luminator (more on that machine later), for a couple of parties, where he described his research into instrumental transcommunication (www.worlditc.org), i.e. using electronic equipment to talk with the 'dead'. The reason I say 'dead' in quotations is that once you've seen his research, you can never again believe that the spirit that leaves a dead body actually dies. His evidence includes computer passages, typed from a computer which was turned on without anyone physically in the room, and which included information only known to the 'dead' woman and her still living husband, and a message left on Mark's own telephone answering machine from a colleague who was 'dead'.

While Mark's presentation is clear and convincing, the best examples of transcommunication he shows are the ones provided by the audience itself. With the Luminator running, he takes Polaroid photos of audience volunteers, and many of the photos have faces completely different from the physical ones of the photo subjects. (I've included 3 of my photos -- one of me (as me, not the best photo, oh, well), one of me that is clearly not me (as there maybe two faces, and at least the nose and mouth aren't mine), and one of my paternal grandmother, who might be the face in the second photo (or maybe not). The only alteration to the polaroid camera is that black tape is place over the light sensor so that the flash doesn't go off, because the spirit faces need a low light situation to be seen on film.

Even more fun for me was getting to hang out with the Luminator. This machine seems to change the electromagnetic field in an area at least a hundred or so feet in diameter. Another clairvoyant who was there described it as changing the energy of the space in my home to that of the borderline between the worlds ('here' and 'hereafter'). At first, I was really taken aback by its power -- it felt like my body was on some kind of speed, or having an adrenaline rush, though my mind was completely normal. As I got used to it, though, something amazing happened. I was 'shown' what happens when you 'die'. I did not have the experience of the tunnel that most near-death experiencers describe (not that I was near death in any way), but doors opened from my heart and I came out on a beautiful landscape, which I was told was different for each person. After a few moments of enjoying that, I was showered with a beautiful green light that permeated me, and then a beautiful yellow or golden light that did the same. After a while, that faded away, and I was back in the beautiful landscape, but this time, there were thousands of 'people' there. (I think this is the welcoming party that everyone talks about.) I was at a distance, hovering in the sky, looking at the assembled group, but I noticed that if I asked for someone, they'd sort of come to the front of the group, or perhaps I zoomed in to them. I was given to understand that in a way, this 'party' is somewhat holographic, as if each soul sent a hologram of a part of itself that I would recognize, not necessarily that the whole soul was there.

A while later, a reproducible way to talk to 'dead' people occurred to me. All I need to do is go back into my heart, open the doors out onto the landscape, be cleansed by light, come out at the party -- and then ask for a particular 'person'. So I tried it with my husband's father, who 'died' when he was 15. I learned some things about him that my husband could verify, which believe me, I didn't know, and others that made sense to him, though he could not actually verify them.

The next day, I happened to be teaching my day-long 'Psychic Skills Workshop', and offered a guided meditation of the process to the participants as a bonus session after class. Everyone stayed, and everyone got to their landscape, and everyone found a person -- not always the person they had thought to contact, but someone they knew! Because it was the first time I had ever done the meditation, I didn't leave enough time for people to have satisfying conversations with those they contacted. Oh, well, that's how you learn.

Funeral

Well, actually, a memorial service, as she was cremated. But it sucked anyway. I mean, most everyone was pretty positive - one speaker said, Charlotte didn't need a eulogy, because everyone knew she was light on earth, grace and compassion personified, as well as a lot of fun. But many of us, including me, got tearful.

What was hard for me wasn't that Charlotte 'died', because if I can't see her or feel her, that's a failure of my communication, not that she has gone out of existence. No, it's seeing my friends suffer. And these are women (and one man, but I think for him it's more about mortality) who know as much as I do that she still exists. One of them, who says, tearfully, that's she not doing well, probably has talked with her, herself. So telling them that I know for a fact that Charlotte is fine doesn't help at all. So there isn't much I can do. I have offered to be there for my friends -- we'll all have to pull together. I feel pretty exhausted, pretty drained by it.

I understand that funerals are for the living, but I really get now, how selfish grief is. It's not about the person who 'died', it's about the person who still 'lives' and what they 'lost'. And perhaps funerals help, so that people don't feel alone in their grief, but maybe they make it worse, too, because all that sadness and loss is in one room together, reinforcing itself. And we all know that the 'dead' person wouldn't want us to feel awful.

As Charlotte says, "There is nowhere that I am not." Wow! So she really is right here. Was there in the room with us, too.

Though I must say, I kept expecting Charlotte, in her body, to walk around a corner into the hall.

Before the event, I 'saw' that I was supposed to stand in the back right corner of the room, and send healing energy into it. I spent the entire service standing in the back corner, gave my seat to a friend, in fact, so I could do it. I asked 'the folks' to send energy, and at points could 'see' a golden light in the room. And I tried, as much as I could, to attach the frayed ends of people's cords to Charlotte to the light. I don't know how well that worked, but I think I 'heard', as I fell asleep last night, that I had done a good thing.

Today, I'm going to help her (adult) daughter, an only child, deal with the financial picture, which I understand isn't pretty, because of all the medical bills (don't get me started on national health insurance, which we should have). Maureen shouldn't lose the house she grew up in because her Mom had the temerity to get sick. At least I can try to help.

Boo Hoo

I felt awful because I'd missed Charlotte's leaving of her body, as if, had I been there, I would have done enough for her, or been complete with her somehow. I desperately wanted to apologize.

I'm not a reliable medium under the best of circumstances -- sometimes 'dead' folks come through very clearly, and sometimes not at all. And this was definitely not the best of circumstances. What to do on a Sunday night? I called my friend, Kat, with whom I trade readings and NLP work regularly, and asked, "How are you as a medium?"

"Pretty good right now," she replied.

So we got into it. And actually, she had had one phone conversation with Charlotte, several months back, when Charlotte wanted a reference on a healer with whom Kat had trained. So perhaps that made it easier.

I knew she 'had' Charlotte, because when I asked Charlotte (through Kat) if she'd seen Boo (Charlotte's cat, whom I loved, who'd crossed over about 6 months before Charlotte, eaten by a coyote -- and that never happens in Mill Valley), she replied in a very flat tone, "Boohoo". This was the title of an email Charlotte had sent me announcing Boo's crossing, which I'd thought was wonderfully funny, even as I missed Boo. And it was something I'd remarked to Charlotte about more than once.

So I apologized to Charlotte for not being there when she left her body -- and she told me she hadn't wanted me to be there! At which point I realized a few things:

** Grief over someone's death has a few separate components:

1. Missing the person, which is partly your own habit body, and partly cords dissolving
   
• Your habit body likes things to stay the same. Maybe this is your neurology, which can't handle paying attention to too many things at the same time, or perhaps its the etheric body. It's the part of you that likes to know if you call a certain phone number, you'll hear a certain voice.
  
• We all have energetic cords between our chakras, and the chakras of those we are close to. These cords dissolve when a relationship ends (e.g. a romantic relationship) or when someone dies. That's not fun, because we still have the ends of the cords to deal with, like an umbilical cord which is cut but not tied or clamped off -- the ends are just left raw and open.
  
2. Feeling badly that you hadn't done right by the person. But you really can't judge what was "doing right by" someone else, at least not on this plane, because you can't know what his or her soul actually wanted. All you can do is live the best you can up to your own standards, and give yourself the benefit of the doubt, when you do something uncharacteristically forgetful, or even nasty, to someone else -- perhaps you were doing something his or her soul needed you to do.

Charlotte was apparently showing Kat some other plane of existence. Charlotte kept saying it was "so vast" and beautiful beyond description, and that it was cold, that she was cold. It was "not like there (on earth)" and Kat had the impression that Charlotte was fine, but a little lost. So I asked Charlotte, through Kat, what I could do to help, feeling sheepish at the offer, because I didn't think there was anything I could do. But Charlotte said, "send angels -- angels can help."

"Let me see what I can do", I answered, and then silently asked all the folks (some would call them archangels, but I'm not personally clear on their titles) who assist me in readings to help Charlotte. Almost instantly, Charlotte said, "I'm warm" and Kat said she could literally feel her own body get warmer. For me, this was verification that the folks do indeed hear me, and do respond. Way cool! (Or I suppose that Charlotte 'heard' my intention from whatever plane she was in.) But somehow, I did do something. That felt pretty amazing, and Charlotte told me that she wanted me to know how powerful I am, even on one of my worst days.

Thank you, Charlotte, for your kindness and our concern, even after you've left Earth. I'm glad you made a compassionate choice for yourself, and wish you well on your way. Come see me when I cross over (hopefully a long time from now.) And than you, Kat, for you assistance.

So this angel walks into a bar...

Sometimes my life feels like a bad movie -- so trite that you almost can't script it.

Scene 1: Clearing the Clutter

Yesterday, I had a great day, working on cleaning out more clutter from the house and the garage, culminating in a trip with a very full car to Goodwill in mid afternoon. I was supposed to be working on my audio equipment, getting it to work reliably, but that seemed really hard, and I was having fun (!) moving things into the car, and reorganizing the garage, so I kept putting it off. Finally I had a carful, went to Goodwill and dropped it off.

Scene 2: Phone Call

On my return, guilt led me to my desk, where I happened to notice the message light blinking on my phone.

There was a message from a friend, several hours old, saying that a mutual good friend, whom I'll call Charlotte, was in the hospital on her death bed.

Flashback:

Charlotte was the soul of compassion, and the essence of grace, a beautiful spirit in a beautiful body. Though she had not lived a particularly easy life, a single mother who worked really hard at a variety of businesses (from running an in-home day care so she could be there for her toddler, to a jewelry store, to a small therapy practice) and jobs (HR and office support) to support and raise her wonderful (now grown) daughter, she left everything she touched more beautiful and more peaceful. She always knew exactly what to say to ease suffering, always had a smile, a gentle laugh and a positive, philosophical attitude for the more difficult parts of life -- the broken hearts, the illnesses, the financial hardships, including her own. At points when I was low, I always knew I could call her, and I'm sure her other friends knew that, too.

I knew Charlotte was sick, had, in fact, been increasingly sick over the last 10 years. But I'd seen her a few weeks ago, and she'd been in good spirits, saying she was getting better after a real scare.

Scene 2, continued

Though I returned the call immediately, it was too late. Charlotte had already left her body. Had I heard the phone ring, I would have barely had time enough to get to the hospital (an hour away) to say a brief goodbye.

Apparently she had left her body peacefully, attended by a Tibetan Buddhist lama and several good friends. And I know, given the state of her physical body, that it was a good choice to leave now, and gift of compassion to herself. Charlotte, who was always so giving to others, had finally given herself the gift of freedom.

I could only have a short conversation with Ann, the woman who'd called me, because she was too teary. Ann is a very strong woman, and I could hear her trying to stay strong and practical -- but she couldn't. The pain was too fresh. We settled on me calling the next day to get Charlotte's daughter's phone number to see how I can help.

Scene 3: Conversation in the kitchen

So I came upstairs into the kitchen, where my husband was seated at the kitchen table, reading email on his laptop. As I entered, he said cheerily, "Hey, I've got something to show you," to which I replied, "Charlotte died." I caught him up on the news, and then he said, "What I was just about to show you is kind of the opposite of that." There were photos of his cousin's brand new baby girl!

So that's when it hit me... life on earth is kind of like this big saloon. You enter through the swinging doors (take a body), have a drink, some food, hook up, break up, maybe play a game of poker, or pour a beer for someone else, watch the dramas unfolding around you, and leave again through those same swinging doors. Life is not about the tables and the chairs in the bar (clearing the clutter), it's about the angels who come and go.

Ding, Dong, Fallwell's Dead

Okay, I feel a little gulty about this, but the truth is that the news of Jerry Falwell's death did cheer me up a bit. Like I said, I'm not proud of it. On theother hand, if his absence helps the world heal, then it's a good thing. And I believe each of us chooses when to go.

They think he died of a heart problem -- I'm not sure he had a heart (See http://www.thecarpetbaggerreport.com/archives/10806.html), which would, of course, qualify.

To distract myself every time I'm tempted to gloat, I say the following prayer:

"May the hearts and minds of those in power be turned to the good of the earth and its people, or may they be removed from power immediately and permanently."

I do this prayer at least once a day, often many times a day. Do you think it helped?