Sunday, February 13, 2005

I love. Do you?

Many years ago, too many to think about really, I was in love with a guy who wasn't there. Literally. He lived 2,000 miles away, more or less. Now this was in the days before email and ubiquitous cell phones, so we had to content ourselves with letters (remember them?) and the occasional expensive phone call. I was so in love that I would often find myself feeling something warm in my heart, and saying to myself, "I love him."

Then one day, it dawned on me that he wasn't actually present. Whom, exactly, was I in love with? And yet, there I was feeling those feelings. So it wasn't him, or anything he said, or anything he did, that was generating the feelings, but me. It was a thought I had that triggered those delicious feelings. So what I was enjoying was the feeling of loving, which didn't actually require him, or anyone, to be there. And it occurred to me that

"I love" is a complete statement. "I love", period. I love.

No object is necessary. I walked around for a couple of years doing "I love" as a sort of affirmation, though I'm not sure I'd even heard the term at the time. Just saying "I love" to myself, over and over at all times of the day in all circumstances -- walking, showering, standing in the line at the bank.

I began to notice that, at least for me, there is a feeling of being loved, completely separate from the feeling of loving. For me, loving feels like warmth, radiating strongly from my heart, while being loved feels like a (generally weak) warmth in my aura. You'd be surprised where you can feel love returned from when you're putting it out all the time! Animals, plants, rocks, the earth itself, discarnate beings, and oh, yeah, people, too.

Let Valentine's Day be a reminder to you to just love. Loving is truly its own reward.


Becky said...

What a great idea! I'll definitely start using that affirmation!

Renee Stephens said...

I love it!

Well written. I'm going to add this to my rotating affirmations.

Ethan said...

I AM, therefore I LOVE
should replace
"I think therefore I am"
in today's philosophy of self.

daisy said...

I'm thankful I found your email in my inbox today, of all days. I'm at a crossroads, and an event happening tonight will decide many things about my future. I will focus on loving instead of my fears. Thank you.

jaqi said...

You are so right on Hollis, thank you. I've just had 10 minutes of pure love and I can keep it going.